Harrassment

Yesterday, I saw this video through a link on Elite Daily.

It put me in mind of when I used to play the British-made Grand Theft Auto games where walking through the streets of its virtual, fictional American cities, as a male character you'd attract all sorts of comments, and overhear all sorts of other comments between the game's computer controlled characters.
I remember thinking the comments seemed over the top, and were probably a British developer's exaggeration of what American cities sounded like.

This video makes me think maybe I'm wrong.

It seems to me that this kind of cat-calling has little to do with trying to actually get a date or any kind of romance started. Realistically, how often would this approach have succeeded for these guys. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe if I actually did it, I would have a veritable harem going on right now.
However, I doubt it. I think this sort of calling is about establishing dominance. It's about establishing dominance over the woman in question, and about establishing alphaness in the presence of other males. It shows loudly that you are straight, that you are attracted to the socially acceptable "right" kind of woman, and that you have no fear about making this known. By shouting at this woman, they are staking a claim and reminding the woman, the generally physically weaker of the sexes, and the historically less-empowered of the sexes, that she is vulnerable and could be "had".
This sort of behaviour just never occurs to me. It's not like it's an impulse I fight down, or an urge I have but struggle with overcoming the nerves to do it. It just doesn't occur.

Yes - some of the guys are just asking, "how you doing?". You could argue they're just being friendly. They're just making conversation. You could. And I'm not going to say absolutely that those were their only motives. That would be unfair. But I think it would be naive to assume that they had nothing on their mind other than befriending another human being. I would suggest that remaining seated with your mates as a woman walks purposefully by and shouting "how you doing today?" at her doesn't suggest a genuine interest in either friendship or romance so much as a desire to look alpha in front of your mates.
Though it is silly and a running joke, there's a reason it's Joey's catcphrase on 'Friends'. It's a line.

As for the guys who walk alongside her, that's just creepy. The one guy seems to feel that it's his God-given right to be responded to by an absolute stranger who showed no interest in an interaction, and furthermore like it's his right to claim her telephone number.
The guy who just walks with her in silence for several minutes I have no idea about. It almost seems as if he wants to intimidate her into responding to him so that she made the first move. I wouldn't be surprised if after she told him to back off, he had a go at her involving the phrase, "it's a free country", thereby reaffirming a protective belief he holds that women approach him all the time but they all turn out to be crazy.

But I'm extrapolating, perhaps unfairly.

I can only imagine how horrible this feels. As a man, the nearest thing I've had happen is for a man to call out to me asking for a cigarette, or spare change or something, and then proceed to follow me and keep asking after I've said "no". I'll be honest, I've been nervous in these situations. I don't know when or if they'll leave me alone, and if they'll get nasty or violent if I continue declining. I spend my time then wondering if ignoring them, continuing declining politely, or getting angry back at them is the best way to end the situation.
That's over a cigarette I don't have to give or be taken.
This isn't over the prospect of a sexual experience I DO have to give or be taken.
And we all know how sexual thoughts can short circuit some men's thinking. It's certainly done some pretty stupid things to my own thinking before now and I've made some bad decisions in this state before.

Through this video, I've become aware of the Hollaback charity - http://www.ihollaback.org/, dedicated to ending street harassment. I don't yet know how they plan to do that, but I see they are raising money to make videos like this, organise for speakers to talk on this, and generally raise awareness. Maybe they're combating the argument that "I'm just being friendly," or "You look nice. Why shouldn't I tell you?" by pointing out that no - it's not friendly and it makes people uncomfortable when you do that so stop it.

Follow me on Facebook: www.facebook.com/CurtisAllenIllustrator
Visit my shop: www.etsy.com/uk/shop/capndred